„I can resist everything but temptation“

The dilemma of striking the right balance between mindless passive entertainment and wasting your life away...consciously.

Photo by Olivia Herlambang-Tham on Unsplash

The two-headed monster inside of us

If we can be summarised by what we think, ie “I think therefore I am”, then I am one big walking dilemma.

My head is full of dichotomies and conundrums, generally expressed as „yes, but...“ leaving me devoid of a concrete conclusion or determined action.

This is often manifested in situations where I want to take the easy way, the path of less resistance, do something easy and pleasant, for fun and entertainment. Could also be about doing sport (and not).

The voice of reason instantly and indignantly bellows “Oh, noooo, that’s too easy, that’s not productive, that’s not helping you grow, that’s a waste of time. Everyone can choose this path, but you’re not everyone. You’re better. Ergo, take the road less travelled, even if you don’t want to (and isn’t resistance the sign that you’re on the right path!? Oh so confusing!)”

To this dictum, my frivolous happy-go-lucky voice counters with “Come on, why make things always hard and calculated, just enjoy this moment. It’s your time to have a break. Not everything has to have meaning and purpose all the time. Be kind to yourself. Spoil yourself”. Oh, that is an excellent point! How can you argue with that?

The big red N - our free will Nemesis

I find this dilemma is nowhere more rampant than when it comes to our free (so perceived!) time, in my case generally in the evening after 9 pm.

I am relatively lobotomised by then and my abilities to discuss astrophysics or read Proust’s In Search of Lost Time (I do recommend that graphic novel though) stand pretty much at zero.

So, like many others, I face the magic glare of the iPad and my finger hovers over big red N sign. You know the one.

To click or not to click? To watch some random trash or do something intelligent, productive - I have so many unfinished projects after all. Or just go to bed and finally sleep for more than 6 hours!?

Ugh, I click. And I quietly deride myself for lacking in discipline. Again.

Out of boredom and lack of proactive choices, I succumbed to Netflix’s highly promoted and Number 3 in Switzerland series Bridgeton.

I generally resist anything highly rated or promoted as I don’t want to be ‘the mass’ (though I know I am, damn it) and I don’t want to prove to Netflix that their recommendation algorithm could possibly have any effect on me.

To me, any recommendation is like the Big Red Button of destruction (=distraction). I just don’t want to be predicted.

Don’t click.

But I clicked because I am indeed an average person. And everyone is watching Bridgeton. My parents in New Zealand were watching it. I heard friends say it’s a bit trashy, but it’s quite fun.

Indeed the first couple of episodes were entertaining and promising. Characters/actors were slightly tedious, but perhaps that’s the point - could it be smart enough to be be a satire of itself? It had a curious ambiguity of non-determinable fashion and styles, some intriguing caricature like characters and an inkling of relevant social themes.

So I continued.

I hate it when it’s my fault

But as it went on and towards the last three episodes, I started to get progressively bored, irritated and offended. I felt an infringement on my time, on my sense of art and any cinematographic decency. Apologies for expressing violence, but I wanted to just slap and kick this Daphne girl.

The reality is, I wanted to slap and kick myself because I continued to look on. Watching Netflix is reminiscent of the car crash effect, you just can’t stop looking.

I lost 8 hours of my life. It’s not a lot, it’s a standard working day that you generally look forward to ending. But I was mad. Frothing. Mad at myself and also mad at others (for doing the same as me).

I can’t even be angry at Netflix, because ultimately it’s my choice and my fault for clicking. By clicking I have confirmed the magic of their recommendation algorithm. By being too lethargic to make a decision and stop watching I contributed to the high ranking of the show.

N is for Newton’s Law of Inertia

And here is my problem. Newton’s first law states that a stationary object will remain stationary and a moving object will continue to move until acted on by an external force. Unless we are the external force to stop the promotion and rating of such productions, they will continue to move (up). Unless we are the external force to our automated finger click, we will continue to sit on the sofa paralysed and get annoyed.

Our failure to resist and make a strong, motivated decision about what we do, watch and read online (and offline!) has a direct impact on how something is valued, and the success it propagates. This show will get a 2nd season because there were many bored people. This feels wildly unfair to all the better shows that were eclipsed.

Just for fun, I read some of the reader comments on IMDB, which turned out to be more entertaining than the show itself:

• Watching clothes spinning in the dryer, is a better use of your time than watching this…

• Quite possibly the worst thing I have seen on TV this year and trust me, it is up against some stiff competition!

• Drivel. Opening scenes looked promising. Lavish, expensive and colourful. Rapidly descended into garbage.

And these people finished the series! Like me.

Incidentally, the Guardian published an article just yesterday on other “I wish I knew how to quit” shows.

This brings me comfort that I’m not alone in my mindlessness but also great sadness that this is a virus without a vaccine.

Big Brother vs Temptation

In the end, Netflix doesn’t care what I think. It knows that the series was a success. All that’s important are the viewer numbers and they got them. Even if the viewers were cursing at the screen.

So my dilemma is, to what degree should we satisfy our temptation to do something brainless, easy and resistance-free in our spare time when it has a bigger impact on content, people and social perceptions?

On the other hand, curbing our enthusiasm for silliness feels like Big Brother controlling our behaviour (don’t watch something of poor quality for fun because Big Brother will know and make a sequel!) and I also want to rebel against that. I will do what I want!

See - my head is a mess.

In Search of not Lost, but Well Spent Time

The peace of mind I reached is that it’s about conscious choices and being aware of their impact. Then we need to evaluate how much that impact is important to our ethos (and other goals in life).

If I spend it watching rubbish (also YouTube is a big fat hairy love/hate monster to mention here), it sends a signal to the digital Gods, and possibly not the one I’d be happy about. But we all need mental downtime and watching trashy videos (the preacher here is not exempt!) is ok, we just have to be aware.

If I’d spent these 8 hours of Bridgeton to read my book, I’d be finished. Or to play the piano, then I’d finally master that Mozart piece that I’m chewing on for 2 years. And no-one but I would know about it. Such rare luxury.

PS. The heading is by Oscar Wilde.